3/17/18

How Long Would It Take To Buy Really Cool Shit?

Forbes recently released their latest billionaire list which included 2,208 billionaires with a collective net worth of $9.1 TRILLION! Let's all take a moment and say a prayer for Bill Gates who was leapfrogged for the top spot by Jeff Bezos who nonchalantly added about $30 billion in net worth in the past year.

Another day, another 82 million dollars -- am I right?

Since Smart Money Seed is still a few years away from amassing a billion dollar valuation, we decided to have a little fun and dream about what a massive amount of wealth could possibly bring. But we're not interested in the desires of peasants. We're talking about really cool shit.

Let's Make Some Assumptions

First, we have to set a starting point. Let's assume we make $50k a year and will average 3% raises in perpetuity. We'll also assume we can live and work forever because I'm sure at some point we'll have enough money to bargain with God for our immortality.

Let's also assume we'll continue to live off of $50k per year forever and will invest the rest of our money in the stock market earning 10% annual returns. We won't have many recurring expenses once we already own all the shit we use.

 Finally, our favorite assumption is that taxes don't exist. I'm not nearly smart enough to try and factor in taxes to our calculations, but our accountant is plenty smart and just shady enough to setup some sweet tax evasion strategies for us!

To recap:
  • $50k starting salary
  • 3% annual raises
  • $50k annual expenses
  • All money beyond $50k is invested
  • Investments earn 10% returns
  • Immortality. No biggie
  • NO TAXES!

What Really Cool Shit Should We Buy??

If I were ultra-rich, I'd want the following luxuries available to me:
  • Unlimited travel
  • Unlimited communication
  • A badass place to live
  • Unlimited awesome entertainment
  • Food. Lots of food
  • Beer. Lots of beer
  • Menial things to keep myself entertained during my travel
I think that would pretty much cover my basic needs. If I forgot something, let me know and I'll update the article!

How Much Money Will We Have?

Calculations made using The Calculator Site









Milestone recap:
  • Year 37 brings us into the top 1% off the world's wealthiest people according to Investopedia.
  • Congratulations everyone -- we're millionaires in year 40! Most people would be tempted to retire after 40 years, but not us. we've got really cool shit to buy.
  • Year 59 brings us into the USA's top 1% at over $7 million again according to Investopedia.
  • $113 billion in year 108 makes us the world's richest person (assuming they don't get any richer). Suck it, Bezos!
  • Although the world has never seen a trillionaire, we're the second in history to hit a quadrillion bucks thanks to Paypal.

How Much Money Will We Need?

Let's take a look at exactly what we want to buy and what that might set us back.
  • Unlimited Travel 
Of course we're going to need a plane, and we're not going to stop at anything short of the greatest luxury available. That's right, folks we're buying Air Force One for a cool $660 million. But everyone knows we can't have just one Air Force One or else people will know our whereabouts at all times. Two Air Force One's will set us back $1.32 billion. That's conceivable in this lifetime at 112 years, but we better get crackin on those immortality negotiations with The Big Man.

We'll stop short of buying the most expensive car ever sold, but we're definitely going to need this $14 million McLaren. And of course we're going to need some fuel for all that travel. I know the perfect $33 billion oil company we can buy. Looks like all my coworkers at Marathon work for me now!

Travel Cost: $34.334 billion
Total Cost: $34.334 billion
  • Unlimited Communication
We won't have the freedom to do everything we want without owning the two most powerful communication companies I can think of, Verizon and Apple. Verizon comes cheap at only $200 billion. Apple is going to necessitate a conversation with our financial advisor as that $900 billion check might set us back a bit.

Communication Cost: $1.1 trillion
Total Cost: $1.134 trillion
  • A Badass Place To Live
We're really not going to want people bothering us with all this wealth. A wise man once said, "No new friends." But we really don't want to move, so we're staying right here in the good old US of A. Sorry, but everyone else is getting their asses kicked out. I hear Canada is really nice this time of year.

I'll admit my reference here is a bit sketchy, but Carter Moore helped us out via Quora. The price tag of the United States? Just $46 trillion. Psh -- we'll have that and more well before our 250th birthday. We'll also need a replica of the world's most expensive home, clocking in at $300 million. That doesn't even hardly become a factor in our calculation.

Living Cost: $46 trillion
Total Cost: $47.134 trillion
  • Unlimited Entertainment
There's just no debate here. We're going to have to buy the Disney parks. Josh Arnold from Seeking Alpha estimated Disney's parks segment to be valued at $38 billion. Chump change.

Entertainment Cost: $38 billion
Total Cost: $47.172 trillion
  • Food & Beer
Quite possibly the first purchase I'd make on this entire journey is Chipotle for $9 billion. Another $218 billion nets us Anheuser-Busch InBev -- another easy decision.

Food & Beer Cost: $227 billion
Total Cost: $47.399 trillion
  • Menial Things
I'll take one of everything on Amazon, please. Again we're relying on Quora, and this time it's Kynan Eng to the rescue. $12.86 billion dollars is an absolute steal!

Menial Things Cost: $12.86 billion
Total Cost: $47.412 trillion

We didn't even need to be quadrillionaires to buy everything we wanted! You can't buy happiness, but at 216 years old, we'll have $50 trillion at our disposal to buy everything we could possibly want. Give us a few years to enjoy the things we've worked so hard for, and maybe around 500 years old or so we'll talk to God about getting out of the immortality contract.

I know what you're thinking right now. Wow, what an incredible waste of time. Alex must live such a sad life. Sure, maybe I should find better ways to spend my time on a Saturday. But if I made you smile at least once, I'll consider this article a success. And if you smiled, I'm sure someone else would appreciate you sharing this with them and making them smile too!

2 comments:

  1. You forgot the most important thing. CLOTHES. I would go for Asos at $6.1 billion, but I know you're more into sportswear. A little pricey, but you could get Nike at $15.9 billion. And maybe think about buying Jeni's for dessert for around $30 million.

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    Replies
    1. Good point! Well worth the extra working year.

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